As other conventional culture, the marriage is getting simplified day to day. My aunt was married in 1995, when I was in elementary school. Yet I remember the detail of the procession. And when I attended my cousin’s marriage two years ago, I found many differences in Sundanese marriage.
Here some of them:
My Aunt’s Marriage: When the bridegroom and his family arrived in front of the bride’s house, they were welcomed by three dancers and a man who wore clothes like Kabayan. It took several minutes. Then, those dancers brought the bridegroom and his family to the bride’s house.
My Cousin’s Marriage: When the bridegroom and his family arrived in front of the bride’s house, there were no dancers welcomed them.
My Aunt’s Marriage: After the bridegroom and his family arrived in the bride’s house and the bride’s mother put the flowers necklace to the bridegroom, the bride’s parents brought the bride out of the house and meet her with the bridegroom and his family.
My Cousin’s Marriage: The bride came out of her room just when she and the bridegroom would do the marriage promise.
My Aunt’s Marriage: After sungkeman (demanding apologize to parents) and receiving congratulation from whole families, the bride and the bridegroom did some rites. Such as huap lingkung (the parents fed the bride and the bridegroom with small ball of yellow rice, then the bride and the bridegroom fed each other, after that they tried to get the big part of bakakak ayam), sawer (the bride and the bridegroom threw rice, money and sometimes candy to the audience, and there a singer who sung sundanese song), nincak endog (the bridegroom stepped on an egg then the bride washed his foot), and buka pintu (the bridegroom waited at the outside of the house until the bride opened the door and welcomed him).
My Cousin’s Marriage: After sungkeman and receiving congratulations from the families, the bride and the bridegroom, and also their parents, prepared to do reception.
See, my cousin’s marriage is far simpler than my aunt’s. More minimalist.
I, myself, agree with my cousin’s version, because do some rites could take a lot of time and energy, which is not necessary. I do not mean to leave my own culture. But in the modern life, we have to prioritize things, don’t we?
However, there are few people who do not want to miss any. Well, it is just a choice.
- photo from TirtaDahlia.blogspot.com